Of match dating

The bad thing is that somehow the place encourages us to define ourselves as a checklist of things we like to do.

Shared interests and compatibility are nice, but I’ve always felt like relationships thrive on a chemistry that has very little to do with activities.

When my marriage ended 11 years ago, I went online. They loved to ski, surf, go to the theater, travel to exotic places, go for walks on the beach, run marathons and read. "People present themselves in the best light online," he said.

So I signed up for Match.com, which has more than 21.5 million subscribers. One woman wrote me, "Unlike Popeye, I am NOT what I am but if nothing else I am kind and compassionate and to top it off I am interesting and exciting." None of the women on Match were boring. Philip Muskin, Professor of Psychiatry at Columbia University Medical Center, is not surprised.

If you’re struck with writer’s block, Match offers a Profile Pro service that provides dating experts to review your profile, edit the text so it puts your best foot forward, and offer online dating advice.

After subscribing, members have unlimited access to Match.com’s complete functionality.

But with 87 million singles in the United States and nearly 40 million dating online, it seemed a good way to meet someone.

"No one is going to respond to someone who says they are a couch potato and likes to stay home."I was lucky. (I have friends who have been on dating sites for years.) I corresponded with 50 women and met 15 for drinks, which is recommended over meeting someone for dinner. Because if after 15 minutes you don't like the person you are stuck; and for men that means the bill as well.

Emily Bartz, dating content manager for Next (which provides independent reviews and research of online services for consumers and small businesses), told me that online dating sites are becoming better at matching you to potential dates and online dating is increasingly being done on mobile phone dating apps."The biggest complaint people have about online dating is wasting time with people they have nothing in common with.

Is it a case of looking for love in all of the wrong places, or just a few bad apples in an otherwise happy bushel?

Truth is, many boomers often reach their 50s and older and find themselves uncoupled, either through death or divorce; they don't know where to turn.

And there is a class action lawsuit pending in the U. District Court that claims more than 60 percent of the profiles on are fraudulent -- something spokesman Matthew Traub calls an "unfounded allegation in a money-seeking litigation." Then there is another, perhaps darker, side to the consumer complaints: People reporting that they were bilked out of money by those they connected with through an online dating site.

The Better Business Bureau listed online dating sites among its top 10 scams for 2011, and one consumer advocacy group says its members have lost millions from online dating scams.