When it comes to dating, women have been shown to give the edge to profession and providership over appearance. You also might be able to make a case that some women are looking for a knight in shining white armor to rescue them.
The kind of person who joins the military has already passed through a certain number of professional gates. One psychologist in a Times of India article on men in uniform, suggested that women are attracted to the “chivalry” exuded in the mannerisms of men in uniform.
Curious as to what I was in for, and wanting some solid guidance, I went looking for advice on how to be a good Army girlfriend. However, in my own time as an Army girlfriend, I’ve come upon a few revelations of my own. Dating a soldier is a commitment, and not one to be taken lightly. Above all, talk to people who’ve lived it and ask them to be honest. If you’re not ready for to be an Army girlfriend and all that it entails, break it off. As soon as my guy used the g-word, I hit the keyboard and called my sister-in-law (retired Army wife extraordinaire). Soldiers work long hours that they have absolutely no control over. If you’re one of those girls who always needs a guy on her arm, get used to disappointment. You’ll have time for your friends, family, hobbies and work. And odds are, one of the reasons his time with you means so much to him is because it’s one of the few times he can get away from that life. My boyfriend and I have plenty to talk about, from video games to the funny cashier at the grocery store, and I never bring up the Army to any extent greater than asking him how his day went. If your man is ready to introduce you to the guys in his unit and/or regiment, it’s a big step.
The best advice is to be yourself and try not to act any differently.
What explains the edge military guys have when it comes to online dating? Among our own audiences at Spouse X events, meeting online is always in the top three ways military folks find a mate. We are also always getting letters from women who “met” a military guy online who turns out to be a scammer begging them for money. But for military guys to have an actual advantage before other occupations? Haven’t those women seen the articles about service members on foodstamps? Don’t they get that for every passionate, romantic, picture-worthy homecoming kiss there are (on average) 180 days in which the only lips that touch your own smell like the inside of a sippy cup?? In one study, military men were second in preference only to lawyers. (In case you are interested, women who list themselves as being in law enforcement or the military are among the least successful in the online dating game—which probably tells you something important about their potential partners.) What do these online women think they are getting when they click open the military package? Willing to commit to a job for at least four years at a time.
When it comes to the research, you might be surprised to find that men in uniform really do have kind of an edge when it comes to finding a mate on the Internet. They received an above average number of first contact e- mails, keywords, and were browsed more often than men in other occupations.
Holding all other things constant, guys who stated that they were in the military (like those who said they were doctors or lawyers or firefighters) did have an advantage online.
The research doesn’t say, but we can make some educated guesses. Military guys also marry sooner than their civilian counterparts.